Stoic Fortitude

A couple weeks ago we started a 4 part series on the Four Pillars of Stoicism: Wisdom, Justice, Fortitude, & Self-Discipline. So far we've examined Stoic Wisdom and Stoic Justice. This week we'll take some time to reflect on Stoic Fortitude.

Have you ever had one of those weeks where it felt like everything that could go wrong, did go wrong?! An unpredictable work situation; a phone call about a family circumstance that required immediate attention; and then top it off with a car break down! The frustration levels just keep growing, and our first reaction is to try and control all the outcomes that are clearly beyond our actual control!

This is where the third pillar of Stoicism: Fortitude, can be extremely helpful. The Stoics understood Fortitude not just as toughness or grit, but as the wisdom to focus our energy on what we actually have control over, and the courage to let go of what we don't (sound familiar?).

Those chaotic weeks are the perfect opportunity to practice this ancient wisdom. We might not be able to control the work situation, but we can control what adjustments we can make in response. We can't control the family crisis, but we can decide how we want to show up to support the people we love. We may have done all the preventative maintenance necessary on our car, but in that moment, we still can't control it breaking down. What we can do is decide how we talk to the tow truck driver and how we work to figure out alternative transportation.

Fortitude is about recognizing the difference between what happens TO us and what happens THROUGH us. We don't get to choose many of the circumstances we face, but we always get to choose our response. This isn't about being stoic in the "emotionless" sense that people sometimes think of—it's about channeling our emotional energy toward the things we can actually influence.

I was coaching someone last month who was frustrated with a coworker who constantly interrupted in meetings. We spent time exploring what was within her control: she could speak with the person privately, she could address it in the moment during meetings, or she could adjust how she communicated her ideas to be more concise. What wasn't in her control was whether that person would actually change their behavior. Fortitude meant focusing her energy on her own actions rather than trying to control someone else's.

Fortitude is learning to put our energy where it can actually make a difference.

What situations in your life are draining your energy because you're trying to control things that are beyond your influence? Where could you redirect that energy toward something you actually have power over? Is there a relationship or work challenge where practicing Fortitude might help you feel more grounded and effective?

Here's to practicing Stoic Fortitude this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Stoic Justice

Last week we started a 4 part series on the Four Pillars of Stoicism: Wisdom, Justice, Fortitude, & Self-Discipline. In particular, we looked at Stoic Wisdom and its ability to help us see more clearly. This week we'll take some time to reflect on Stoic Justice.

When we think about justice we might initially think of courtrooms and legal systems, but for the Stoics, justice was about treating others with generosity, kindness, and respect—and having the courage to act on those values even when it's inconvenient. 

For example, I was recently in line at my local Target and watched as the person working the checkout treated everyone with the same kindness and dignity, regardless of what they were buying, what they looked like, or how they acted.  They approached their job with a level of foundational respect for each person they helped, even when there were some "challenges" in the process.

When I think about Justice like this, it makes me realize how often I have opportunities to practice it in small ways throughout my week. When a teammate is struggling with a project, do I offer assistance or just feel grateful it's not my problem? When someone shares a different perspective in a meeting, do I listen with genuine curiosity or immediately start formulating my counter-argument? When I see someone being treated unfairly, do I find a way to speak up or do I stay silent to avoid conflict?

The person at Target could have taken a very different approach (especially with a few of those folks!), and probably felt justified in thinking it was their right to give the customers some of their own medicine! But Justice, in the Stoic sense, isn't about what we're required to do or what we think is fair—it's about what we can do to make our little corner of the world more kind and generous.

Stoic Justice is the daily practice of treating others the way they deserve to be treated as fellow human beings. 

Notice there is a period at the end of that sentence! In other words, we treat them with dignity and respect as fellow humans, regardless of how they may be acting.

Where in your life do you have opportunities to practice Justice in small ways? Is there a situation at work or in your relationships where you could step forward to help create more kindness or generosity? What would it look like to have the courage to do what's right, even when it might be uncomfortable or inconvenient?

Here's to practicing Justice in the small moments this week!

Be Well

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation

Stoic Wisdom

I was doing some reading recently and was reminded of the Four Pillars of Stoicism: Wisdom, Justice, Fortitude, & Self-Discipline.  I was also at a conference last week that had several elements that reminded me of these four pillars, so I thought I would take the next 4 weeks and share some thoughts on each one of them.

Stoic Wisdom - The Art of Seeing Clearly

During the conference, one of the realities we talked about was how much energy we can spend on assumptions that may or may not actually be true.  We can take on stress not from what's actually happening, but from the stories we tell ourselves about what we think it happening.

This is something the ancient Stoics understood deeply and is rooted in the first pillar of their philosophy, Wisdom—specifically, the wisdom to see things as they actually are, not as our emotions or assumptions tell us they are.

The Stoics defined Wisdom as the ability to navigate complex situations with clarity and understanding. It's about learning to separate facts from our interpretations of those facts. When we realize our stress is coming from our stories rather than our circumstances, we are practicing this ancient wisdom.

I think about this in my own life when I catch myself rehearsing difficult conversations in my head (which I do way too often!). I'll imagine all the ways someone might respond, getting myself worked up about scenarios that haven't even happened yet. The Stoic practice of Wisdom invites me to pause and ask: "What do I actually know right now? What are the facts, and what are the stories I'm adding?"

For example, if a colleague doesn't respond to my email for a few days, the simple fact is: they haven't responded yet. But the stories I might tell myself could range from "they're ignoring me" to "they must be overwhelmed" to "they didn't think my message was important." Wisdom helps me recognize that I don't actually know why they haven't responded—and that's okay.

Wisdom is learning to work with what we know, not what we assume.

What stories are you telling yourself about your current circumstances that might not actually be true? Where in your life could you benefit from seeing a situation more clearly, separating the facts from your interpretations? Is there a relationship or work situation where practicing this kind of Wisdom might bring you more peace and better decision-making?

Here's to practicing Wisdom and seeing more clearly this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.