Fresh Eyes

We recently had some people over to our house for a gathering. Of course that involved getting things ready, cleaning, yard work, etc. (I'm still convinced that part of the reason my conservative college had an open house in the dorms every other week was to force some of us to clean our rooms!). That process of getting ready and then sharing time with people in that very familiar space, reminded me of seeing the world with "Fresh Eyes."  

For example, one of the preparation tasks was to go around and look for cobwebs in the plants and our retaining wall area in our backyard. Truthfully, I don't pay very close attention to that, but since I was looking with fresh eyes, I was surprised at how many cobwebs I found! I also walked our pathway to the top of the hill in our yard, collecting debris and generally cleaning up.  Not a section I go to very often, but we do have a couple of chairs up there.  One of our guests commented on it to me, saying how cool they thought it was that we created a small sitting area up there. A fresh set of eyes reminded me that space is cool, and I should sit up there more often!

It's easy to get so accustomed to seeing the same things in the same places, we just don't really notice them anymore. This is why seeing the world with fresh eyes, or a different perspective can be so helpful. Sometimes I think those fresh eyes can be ours, when we purposefully start looking for something (like the cobwebs). Other times, those fresh eyes can come from people around us and we get to see life through their perspective, which helps to open us up (like my friend commenting about my sitting area at the top of my hill). Regardless of whether it's me trying to see something with my own fresh perspective, or taking in the world through another person's view, seeing with Fresh Eyes can really help to open us up to new alternatives and approaches to life.

If you were to look at a challenge you are currently facing with some fresh eyes, how might that help you find a new angle to approach it? Is there someone you trust you can share that challenge with so you can get their perspective on the situation? How might just taking another, more direct look at it help to shift it from being a challenge to being an opportunity?

Here's to taking a look with some Fresh Eyes this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation. 

Eventually!

I just had a friend return from a trip that included a 10-day trek through a section of NorthUmbria in the UK. They did some research on their adventure before they went, but interestingly enough, most of the guidebooks talked about the history of the area, the various landmarks and scenery along the way, but didn't include too much information about the topography of the land.  So, much to my friend's surprise, their trek involved a lot more elevation change from day to day than they realized! However, through some significant perseverance and effort, they made it!

At one point along the way, their GPS went out and they just had to follow the descriptions in the guidebook that included phrases like, "walk between the two fences," and "go alongside the burn."  One of the phrases even read, "eventually you will come to a road," without a reference to any specific distance. Turned out that "eventually" took almost 2 hours of walking!

I've been reflecting on that word "Eventually" since my friend told me that story, and I have been wondering how many times I might have been tempted to quit something if I actually knew the actual distance connected to it.  For example, I've been working on some projects in my backyard.  Eventually, several of them have gotten done, but most of them have taken me longer to complete than I originally thought (and involved way more trips to Home Depot than I planned)!  Now that they are complete, I am very happy with them, but if I had known at the beginning how much time, energy and money it was going to take to get them finished, I may have been deterred from starting.  Knowing that I would "eventually" get done helped me get started and allowed me to just keep going in the process. 

Maybe there are some areas of your life where you are in the middle of the trek and the only marker you have right now is "eventually." Eventually the project will be finished.  Eventually the position will be filled.  Eventually your choices will help bring about the results you want. Is there a way you can use the "Eventually" as a motivation to press on?  Can the vision of what you know is coming in the future help you just keep taking another step forward today? Could it even be possible to relax into the "eventually" enough that you can enjoy your current place on the journey right now?

Here's to knowing this week that "eventually" we'll get there, so we'll just keep walking today!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Kind? True? Necessary?

Sometimes I wish I could forget lessons I have learned!  

When I was in college a friend of mine shared with me three small questions he asked himself before he spoke: "Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?" He told me that if he couldn't answer yes to all three, then he would not say what he was thinking!

Of course I had questions about his questions!

"What if it's kind and true, but not necessary?" 

      "Why would I say it if it wasn't necessary? That would probably only create trouble or drama that no one wants."

"What if it's kind and necessary, but not true?"

      "Why would I want to tell a lie? How does that help anyone?"

"OK, but what if it's true and necessary, but it isn't kind?"

      "Then I figure out a way to say it differently so it is kind, and if I can't, why would I want to be unkind?"

All good points, and you can see why there are times I wish I could forget this life lesson!

The truth is, these three, small questions have actually served me well over the years. I know there have been times when I failed the test and opened my mouth anyway, and usually the results were less than helpful!  I have also discovered over the years that I can apply this to actions as well. Is what I am about to do kind, true and necessary? And if not, then why would I want to do that?  When I am able to listen to these prompts and I take a moment to analyze my motives, I am often being driven by fear or anger or spite, and it's never a positive outcome when I'm speaking or acting from those motivations.

How could you use these three questions in your own life this week?  Are there certain relationships where they could be very helpful for filtering your words or actions? Are there specific leadership situations where they might be particularly impactful? 

Here's to using these three questions well this week: Is it Kind? Is it True? Is it Necessary?

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.